5.24.2005

Metal Mascots: A Case Study

How come the Foo Fighters don’t have an adorable chihuahua on all of their T-shirts? Why isn’t there a tough-looking half alien, half zombie on the cover of System of a Down’s new record? And why don’t Franz Ferdinand use comic book imagery to drive their merch sales? We miss the days when bands (particularly metal bands) had a mascot to go with their music. Days when band T-shirts included tour dates on the back, when stage shows included tons of pyro, and when drum solos were a neccassary part of every skinsman’s repetoire. Surely the Mars Volta would sell tons more records if they included a flying skull named Volty on their covers. And wouldn’t you be more apt to buy a My Chemical Romance hoodie were it emblazoned with a flaming Unicorn? In hopes of insipiring today’s bands to bring back the rock mascot, here are a couple classics:

Band: Iron Maiden
Mascot: Eddie
Grade: A
Verdict: Bow down before the king of all metal mascots.

Band: Anthrax
Mascot: The not man
Grade: B
Verdict: The oversized cartoon head wasn’t very metal, but he summed up the band’s sense of humor.

Band: Motley Crue
Mascot: Allister Fiend
Grade: D
Verdict: Cartoony hard rocker with space gun and two-toned hair who appeared on their early merchandise.

Band: Overkill
Mascot: Chaly, the bat-winged skull
Grade: B+
Verdict: Skulls are tough. So are bats. Why not combine the two?

Band: Dio
Mascot: Murray
Grade: B-
Verdict: Red-eyed ghoulish thingy that appeared on a number of album covers including “Holy Diver” and “The Last in Line.” But how evil can a Murray really be?

Band: Grim Reaper
Mascot: Grim reaper
Grade: F
Verdict: Generic devil mascot matches generic German metal.

Band: Megadeth
Mascot: Vic Rattlehead
Grade: D
Verdict: A big time Eddie ripoff, this well-dressed skeleton that sported shades showed up on a number of the band’s early records.

Band: Helloween
Mascot: Jack-o-lantern
Grade: C-
Verdict: The scariest vegetable in metal history.

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22 comments:

  1. Anonymous says:

    Not metal, but what about the Screeching Weasel weasel?:
    http://www.interpunk.com/itemimages2/79132.jpg

  2. Matt says:

    I am so disappointed that you ignored SOD’s Sergeant D.

  3. More Metal Than You says:

    Vic Rattlehead isn’t wearing sunglasses. He has a metal plate bolted onto his skull, covering his eyesockets. And large, steel hooks holding his jaw shut. Don’t forget the chains that are fused to the side of his head. He’s worthy of at least a B-.

    And I agree with the previous comment. It’s criminal that you even included Motley Crue in this list but not S.O.D.

  4. Pentagram says:

    Vic probably should have deserved a higher mark, he wasn’t designed after eddie, but after a megadeth song, and it’s clear on their first album *where the songs appears and also the cover ffeatures an actual school with bolts, chains, and what not on it)

  5. Manguin says:

    Your about an idiot did you even bother to research this. I agree that Eddie is the best but wheres monster magnets bull god or motorheads and even C.O.C theres more then 3 metal mascots, plus you said Vic is sporting shades. Have you ever even listned to megadeth come your coming off as an idiot.

  6. Hoov3r says:

    If you bothered to observe.

    Vic is sporting the

    here no evil, see no evil, speak no evil guise. Vic is a skull btw, not a zombie.

    enough said.

    And to people bitching about soad, they are ok… but not metal in the sense of it being true metal. more like circus/ska/tarentela

  7. Colin Garland says:

    Grim Reaper was actually a British band and decidedly different than most German metal. Their guitarist Nick Bowcott is a widely respected player and a noted columnist in several guitar technique mags.

    But yes, their mascot sucked.

  8. You Don't Know Metal!!! says:

    Dude, you wouldn’t know real metal if it bit you on your earlobe, I’m surprised you even got Eddie right. Your interpretation of Megadeths mascot is so far off I’m surprised Dave hasn’t shown up at your door to whoop your…Anyway get a clue, and where the h did you get that anthrax even had a mascot, and another thing Allister Fiend is a combination (take a closer look, you’ll see them) of all four members of the Crue, who also put their voices together to record “In Th Beginning” on shout at the devil which was credited to Allister, If your going to write about something you know nothing about… RESEARCH, RESEARCH, RESEARCH, got it there Divinci?

  9. You Don't Know Metal!!! says:

    P.S. Helloween was a play on Halloween, hence using the Jack-O-Lantern SYMBOLISTICALLY, IT WAS AND IS NOT A MASCOT, as Manguin stated previously, IDIOT!!!.

  10. You Don't Know Metal!!! says:

    P.S.S. The only mascot that deserves any recognition at all is in fact Eddie, Because,1. he has appeared on every Maiden album cover since the beginning in a different fashion (they have their own artist commissioned to design eddie) 2. Maiden Rules and 3. MAIDEN RULES, Maybe you should have included Disturbeds “The Guy” in that list who was designed by the master himself Todd Mcfarlane, now he gets an A++++++++! OK, I think I’m done proving this impostor knows nothing about metal or the mascots now, Peace and Horns Too Ya!!

  11. Yuppiepunk World HQ says:

    Well at least you guys don’t take your metal too seriously.

  12. *Metal As A Way Of Life* says:

    If you need help with your “CASE STUDY”, which it appears you might, visit me here: http://www.myspace.com/masseur395

  13. *Metal As A Way Of Life* says:

    In fact go ahead and give me a visit cause you have two different things going on here with your study. http://www.myspace.com/masseur395

  14. Kurt Metal says:

    I was looking for Metal Mascots, and I find metal mascots.
    By the way, Helloween used that Punkin guy in videos dancing around, so he is infact a mascot.
    You don’t know Metal does in fact NOT know metal. Sorry.
    Oh and they sucked anyway.

  15. TyMan says:

    Come on! Where’s Metallica’s “Scary Guy”? Or that Motorhead beast thing!

  16. Loungelzrd says:

    The “you don”t know metal” guy, seems to be a little hostile and a little misinformed himself. Mr. not was infact a part of Anthrax. I was @ a couple of shows during there hayday and had a human like puppet parading aroung onstage( during the I Am the Man Days) dressed as Mr. not. Desiggned by Mr. Scott”not” Ian. I even owned a fingure puppet.

    Either way, the most popular I would imagine is Eddie. Every personality of, ROCKED.

    The Exploited, C.O.C, , DRI( maybe logo more than mascot) G.B.H. But lets all see who remembers what, as supposed to bashing the ones that are trying. UP THE PUNX

  17. you're all posers says:

    You should probably not be posting statistics on metal when you in fact do not know metal and (gathering from explanatory paragraph) support bands that any metalhead would despise as it is.

    Despite the fact that you left several mascots out that might have been a little more deserving than motley crue out, your rating for Rattlehead doesn’t make much sense. There is no way that a big skeleton with metal bolted to every orifice is in any way a rip off of eddie in any way.

    What is your rating system anyways, the helloween pumpkin, which does not in fact constitute a mascot, gets a C, but Vic gets a D because yahoo answers probably told you so.

    Also, you dont know metal DOES in fact know metal…
    or at least more than you because he probably didn’t use google for his information

    oh, and btw, i wouldn’t be more apt to buy a my chemical romance anything if they had a cool mascot because a “flaming unicorn” still doesn’t change the fact that they suck. My musical preference is actually based on music quality and talent.

    Please, Kurt you do NOT in fact know metal.

  18. ben says:

    Disturbed’s mascot kisk ass, it’s on their last album’s cover he’s almost as cool as Eddie

  19. Shredder says:

    What about my dick in Britney Spears’ asshole?

  20. EdgUy says:

    snaggletooth (motorhead), Hector (hammerfall), Set Abominae (Iced Earth) are missing …

  21. James says:

    Vic doesn’t “sport shades” He’s got a metal plate BOLTED onto his face. That’s the metal-est thing I’ve ever heard. Along with metal ear plugs and rivetted mouth: see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. Nothing to do with Ed the Head. Which is a ZOMBIE not a SKELETON! *difference. Vic is at least a B. AT LEAST!

  22. Peter says:

    What about Sodom’s Knarrenheinz? And Kreator’s Violent Mind?

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