The Seattle International Film Festival has again begun, and we finally made it out to see our first film: “Everyone Stares: The Police Inside Out.” The film documents the sudden success of rock pioneers The Police, as told through the Super8 movies of drummer Stewart Copeland.

All of us here at YuppiePunk World HQ are huge fans of The Police, so we were mighty excited to get an insider’s glimpse at one of the most important bands of the late ’70s/early ’80s. Plus, we’d long heard about the band’s nasty breakup and knockdown drag out fights. We were curious to see just how much of a prick Sting could be. Needless to say, we were wildly disappointed.

For starters, the grainy Super8 home movie footage the film is compiled from isn’t up to snuff. It simply doesn’t look good blown up to fill the big screen. As well, the audio from those old Super8 cameras is crummy, though Copeland does use a slew of Police tunes on the soundtrack, some of which he remixes with interesting results.

The biggest problem with the film however, is that nothing bloody happens! With a terse 76-minute running time, we hoped the film would be a wall-to-wall highlight reel, but the band comes across as exceedingly boring. Where are the drugs? Where is the sex? And where is anything interesting? To boot, the film is devoid of almost any compelling dialogue. Sting says maybe 6 things throughout the whole film, and Copeland’s running narration skips huge chunks of the band’s history. When the film ends before “Synchronicity” even begins, it is almost laughable. What do you mean it’s over?

Even as an intellectual drummer’s personal account of life in one of the era’s great rock bands, the documentary falls short. The film could have been vastly improved with any kind of supplemental material, and it would have been nice to have gotten interviews or something from some of the other folks that were there. As it stands, “Everyone Stares” is an ordinary account of an extraordinary band. Perhaps this leaves the door open for another film — a more definitive account. This version it seems, like the title of a Copeland-penned song from “Zenyatta Mondatta,” is bombs away.

In a sad sidenote, the film is dedicated to Copeland’s brother Ian, the Police’s agent, who passed away just days before the screening.

You can check out the trailer for the film below:
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